Guess what time of year it is?!!!!!
Diet time.
*balloons deflate*
Let's just say....Princess has been having a little too much fun this summer. For some reason I cannot go on vacation without eating my way through the town putting on a few pounds. It took me quite some time to realize my fattness weight gain. Wearing comfortable, flowy skirts all summer will do nothing to remind you of your increasing buttocks.
My boys had their first baseball practice the other night and I threw on a pair of capris before we left because the temperatures had plunged to like freezing 85 degrees at night.
(All you yankees can shut it. If you don't know that I am a sun bunny and not a snow bunny by now, you must be a newbie.)
Anyfatty, back to my story.... Those capri pants fit like a glove....alleged OJ's glove. They were T-I-G-H-T. (And not the slang "tight" that means something good. The old meaning of tight that means....well....tight.)
After my revelation, I tried to put my fat hiney under the pillow. But alas, the Skinny Fairy did not show up. At first, I thought maybe she forgot....like the tooth fairy does on occasion. *ahem* So I did it again. Still...a no show.
At this point, I'm forced to lose the weight the old fashion way....starving diet and exercise. I'm on day three and I miss butter am working through the hunger. I've managed to lose 3 lbs. (I know, I know...it's water weight. Don't rain on my parade!)
I need some accountability. Since apparently I cannot trust my skirts....
I am going to post a before pic and then when I lose the weight I will post an after pic.
Before
Ok...real before
After day 2.
Shut up. There is NOT any photoshopping deception involved here. I have no idea what you are talking about. My diet is really working. I am going to publish it and be a GAZILLIONAIRE.
Don't worry. I will take you all on a fabulous vacation...after we all lose our weight.
And we will look like this....
Wait...I mean like this....
Who's with me?
Posts
32 comments:
omg, seriously----if either of those is for real your ass----we can't be friends if you are dieting.
You better start eating some cupcakes right now.
I conquer with above. If that jean clad derriere belongs to the princess then your a lunatic and need no dieting and a new mirror.
Just saying.
I'm here to call her out to the masses.
The last picture of her ass is REAL. She took that picture no more than a week or so ago.
I've tried to tell her, but she doesn't listen.
I know she's uncomfortable in her clothes, so I will support her in her weight loss mission, but really, the three pounds she's already dropped should be plenty to fit into those damn carpi pants.
I love you Cessy, but they're right. You need a new mirror, and if you stop putting your capri pants in the dryer, they won't feel so tight.
Seeing those butt pictures reminds me that in my high school yearbook, we had an entire page of butts. I KNOW! Clothed, but still. Who thought in 1992 you could get away with 2 pages of people's butts. I still marvel that we got away with it. And wonder if all those butts still look so damned good!!
I hear you! Like you, no one is going to consider me fat but, even so, I know when my stuff doesn't fit right, like now. ;)
When Im all healed up from this tummy tuck Im gonna start that
P90x DVD set my husband bought. He got it for himself, laughed at it, put it back in the box and hasnt touched it since.
Im also gonna get the Zumba DVD set. Cause it looks like fun!
So, start working out everyday, it will be just like we are working out together! =)
I agree with all the above...That behind is not fat at all...I am with you on the tempt situation...In AZ we are cooling down to 98....
I don't see why you need to diet, lady. But, share your secrets, because my behind needs to get in wedding shape ASAP.
P.S. The weather in H-town is most definitely hanging in the 90's. Maybe you need to make another trip to Texas.
I agree that you look lovely, but I will support your diet mission. I will do my best to avoid talking about my sweet tooth!
And don't be surprised if this Yankee shows up at those practices. This 40 degrees at night crap is... well, crap!
LMAO at your photoshopping. Hilarious.
I hit the gym today for the first time in.... Well, lets just say it has been a while... But butt is suffering the same affliction. While peeps tell me I'm no fatty, I am currently a girl with no pants that fit...
The elephant pic made me laugh out loud. Your asstastic! But I understand if you can't breathe in your clothes.
I will tell you that you are not fat. Because you are not.
BUT! (butt? LOL) I totally understand feeling like you need to lose weight, even though others tell you you don't have to.
It's why I've actually gone to the gym the past two days.
lol, I'm in :)
we are actually heading to the lake after school today and i will proudly be wearing my one piece!
couldn't find any chocolate in the house so I just downed a half a bag of chocolate chips. Hold the judgement!
I'm your newest follower.
Come on over. www.melonbelly.blogspot.com
Haha I love this post. I wish you luck with your diet although (if that's really you) you have a fabulous butt.
I'm with Jenn. Blame your dryer. That's what happened to my clothes. Honestly. All of them. I'm buying a new dryer tomorrow.
I feel ya Princess. I haven't put back on the weight I lost, but I haven't moved in months. *sigh*
There is nuthin' wrong with your butt, girl!!
Im with ya on that weight loss mission......although I need to be on it a year longer than you do, cause really you dont need a diet after that ass picture, but I do understand the not feeling good in your own skin..or should I say clothes! Good luck to ya princess :)
Ugh...I'm back on the diet wagon too! =) Coming over from Sara's Domestically Challeneged. Have a GREAT weekend!
I am all about it!
Just pulled out my pilates dvd today. I dusted it off....I put it in the dvd player.....I ate some cookies.
Tomorrow I will turn it on and eat my cookies while I watch them exercise.
Baby steps people!
Just avoid those detox diets. Unless you like being dizzy all the time. And drinking herbal tea. Loooooots of herbal tea. You'll pee herbal tea. If you can stay on the seat in your state of light-headedness.
If your toosh looks like that and your dieting....you must be three types of crazy! ;o) Good luck on losing the weight
Same here. I was picking out pants to wear to work and am all..."Hmm, which ones have some sarahadfunthissummer give to them...hmmm..."
Sounds cliche to say, but I am in the same boat right now. The worst feeling in the world is growing out of belts.
I can't tell which one is photoshopped.
j/k
Nice rump.
You best ask for permission before you next post pics of me 6th in from the right staring at the screen.
netiquette
learn it.
I am so with you! I'm there - on either vacation, because I have a feeling you'd be as friggin hilarious as Rose, and make me pee with laughter, even if I'm not 90. (Bladder control issues, anyone?)
PRINCESS!!!!
*blank stare*
It's Manic Mommy Meg...but I'm engaged now & back in the bloggy world! Now as the Dysfunctional Bride! :D
I just wanted to say that I am starting Boot Camp next week so I will be right there with you working out!! :)
Let's lose our FAT ASSES together!
You seriously crack me up. I am your newest follower and luv your blog!
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