To the you dude with the body by Budweiser and Hooters who was waxing his brand new Mercedes SUV outside his dilapidated mobile home....
What I said was....
What I meant to say was....
Are you kidding me?!
Since when does your car costing more than your house make you cool?
I understand that the ladies like a man with a nice car, but once you bring them home the jig is up!!
You're not fooling anyone.
How did you even get that car?!
Did you finance it?
Did you pay with drug money cash?
You might want to take a couple bucks and FIX THE HOLE IN THE ROOF!
Unless you think the ladies dig trailers with convertible tops...
But I'm going to let you in on a little secret......
We enjoy waking up nice and warm (and dry) in the mornings.
Your mom and dad must be so proud...
Actually, she's not.
I talked to her the other day and she thinks you are a loser too.
She's praying you don't get some girl pregnant.
She would prefer her grandchildren not grow up in a meth lab.
And I really don't think that's too much to ask!!!
Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go drink pray that my kids don't end up like this....
Do you have something you'd like to get off your chest? If so, click on that tag up at the top and join in. I promise, you'll feel much better after you do.
*Disclaimer: I am not making fun of people who live in mobile homes. Just douchebags who have a $100,000 custom car and $15,000 piece of crap mobile home.*